Tuesday, February 10, 2009


It is the time of the year when LOVE is the only word you hear everywhere you go..actually, there's something called selective hearing, it simply means that we tend to focus more on hearing what we want to hear [or rather, dun wanna hear, like gossip and such.].so...maybe..[just maybe]...Love is not the only word you will hear after all...

lately, i sense more peace in my heart, even when i rush thru all my projects and the "to-do-list". And there's only one explanation for it--my Big Daddy's Love ^^

prior to this, i have been experiencing some negative emotions, a lot of them caused by how people perceived me, i'm quite sensitive to what people are saying and also their non-verbal communication, which turns out to be not so good after all.

but what amazed me when i tried to seeks comfort in God's arms is that, He scolded me! And for wo consecutive days somemore! He scolded me with such tender and care that i can do nothing but just compelled to bow down before Him who searches all hearts. He told me that i've been focusing too much on myself instead of the One True Love that comes form Him. Eva, it's time to rethink the definitin of Love, cuz you don't knw much bout it after all...

So now, by His grace, i live, and using my life, i shall explore what is means to LOVE.

And seeing that Valentine's is just around the corner, i'm planning a small party for my caregroup, i found it such a blessing to be able to do cards for them, see the smiles on their faces, and hear them laugh-out-loud when i sang =p

Another "profound experience" occurred to me also lately, my ex, julian, who has been out of contact for 5 months, suddenly contacted me again since friday night. i felt so awkward and afraid, but after that i recognize the source of my fear, i fear that i might succumb when he suggested we get back together. I can see that it's not a healthy relationship, but, it's a very comfortable and tempting relationship, one filled with sweet-talks and fluffy rainbows and flowers [just the kinda stuff any normal will fall for]. but i thank God for the wisdom in recognizing this, or else, i'll be stucked in another cycle of "curtains of comfort" which is not good again, like i have fall for so so many times in the past..

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