Friday, February 5, 2010


[pardon my not so organized thoughts, weird sentence structure and grammar mistakes.]

I had dinner with yang chao just now, ended up we talked for 2 and a half hour~

Our topic flied from school to holidays to new year to seasons to society to discrimination to identity to escapism to collectivism to individualistic to childhood to love to happiness to purpose of life to books to literature....etc.... It was nice to chat on and on..we finally went to our own room when they closed the lights of the canteen.

There's 2 things that i remember the most from our conversation:

He told me that he just learned this new concept of escapism, and how zai nan zai nv in China feel that they are happier that why not we let people be if they can be happier that way? isn't it better? Something just struck me, how the pattern of this world is evolving to suit the Kingdom of Darkness better. It's also the same thing that struck me while in my lecture just now.

We live in a digitalized world, yes, technology has benefited us in a huge way, but slowly, the ugliness of internet has shown its true color. Despite the advancing of technology, we are actually still in an age that doesn't differ much to the era before industrial revolution where knowledge means power, and the more power we had, the more knowledge we want in order to secure the existing power we had and to gain more and more. Everything is an ugly cycle that is repeating itself, disguising under different names, whether The Church or The Internet, the end goal? Selfishness.

But what's different now is that this ugly cycle has up it's level, it no longer compete with the Kingdom of Light using human only, now it involves inventions of human- non-living things to advance its purpose. The Mighty Internet, eliminated limitation in Speed, Space, Storage [amount of info we are able to hold in our hands]...ultimately, it's gonna eliminate community.

The more speed we have now, the faster even we want things to be done, and this is what the Devil's gonna offer to us- the shortcut; the easy way out; why wait?..

It will be a sad day when we replace our loved ones with a screen or a webcam [wait, is it what we are doing now already?]. The easy way out will promise us names on facebook wall that will not break our hearts, we do not need to talk to a person, we do not need to look at their annoying attitudes, but yes, we can still be what cost?...We will be just taking all the good things while ignoring the hard part of a relationship that actually will bring us the greater reward.

This questions will keep seducing us with its promise of instant reward and happiness, it will knock on our door and ask us: this is not something bad right?

But you know, life is about taking that risk, the risk of getting heart broken and misunderstood, because with it comes greater reward: the life to the fullest that can only be lived out in a true community, not just a community where everyone is happy and just the way "I want them to be"...A community with emotions; with ups and downs; with shoulders for support and hugs for comfort...real human life..not an imaginary life most of us now live with our friends in the form of a facebook photo.

There's this term in Christianity called "excommunicate", it's basically to kick an unrepentant believer out of the fellowship of the church, my prof said something interesting about this, he said that we are basically "excommunicating" ourselves with the use of internet, it's so true! by expressing our emotions through facebook n blogging instead of talking it through with people, we are really excommunicating ourselves from people who love us, at the same time we are excommunicating them from our lives as well.

Don't get me wrong, i'm not saying the internet is the ultimate evil that we need to defeat, i'm blogging now aren't I?..what I'm saying is that have we reach a point whereby we do not even be our true self anymore in reality? Do we only dare to express ourselves when we don't need to see people face to face? Do we tuck ourselves away in the comfort zone of internet where we can choose who to be our friends in virtual reality because it's easier than handling the emotions you faced with your parents or friends?

You see, the internet comes to our rescue, promises to save us from the heartbreaks we face from people, giving us the easy way out..and it is very hardworking in making sure that the easy way of the World will be more and more easier- to lure us unto that path.

Looking at the Aurora is awesome, but if in our lifetime we're just gonna be satisfied at looking at a photo without taking the risk to actually go there ourselves, the experience of seeing an Aurora in it's fullest glory will never be ours, and all we can do is imagine in the comfort of our own home how it must be like to stand underneath there, even if for just 5 minutes.

Ultimately, the life to the fullest is freely given to people who not only believe, but also dare to take the risk to really trust and to act upon that trust despite circumstances. Aurora is always there, but it's up to us to take the risk to go and claim it.

Another point that we discussed is on the topic of romantic relationship, he was telling me how romance and love is produced by hormones, it will die down after 3 years. So what should people do after that? Divorce is not good right? then should use law to bind people together? should we emphasis on loyalty instead of love? and there's this drama where the character leave each other to have a break in the relationship and decide that if after 3 years they still love each other then it would be true love and they should be together.

I told him that I belief the concept of what love is is different for everyone, and surely distorted by many, but i truly belief that there is an underlying value of what love is that will be agreed universally, because when God made us, He did so with Love, so surely it is there, perhaps it's just too deep for us to comprehend it completely, but at the same time the universal cry and longing for it is so deep that people can't stand any moment waiting to figure out what it is, that's why we chose to take matters into own hands and take the easy way instead.

As for the hormones of love that dies after 3 years, i told him i belief that love is more than hormones. People tends to glorify the romantic relationship shared by two partners in love, but I belief that it is the same kind of love that parents have for their children as well.

If the excitement and joy a mother first found out that she's pregnant is parallel to the first date, then the pregnancy will be parallel to the dating process, so after 3 years..the child starts to be very naughty, break everything in the house, is a mother who loves her child gonna abandon the child? Likely no right? So what gave us the right to tell our husband or wife that we are sick and tired of them already, that they are not good enough for us anymore?

A first time mum who don't know how to take care of her naughty kid is not gonna "divorce" him just because of it if she loves him, she's gonna do everything she can to love her child, she's gonna learn new things to teach her child, she's gonna protect her child even if others scolded her child to be naughty and she knew it to be true, she's gonna nurture her child and give him the best that she can provide.

A lot of times we forgot that this love should be the same that we hold in other relationships. Instead of searching for the easiest way, it should be protected and nurtured. What is her "secret" to loving her child despite everything? She see herself in the child, she knows by all her heart that first and foremost he is hers, this simple fact is more important than him being naughty.

A mother will lay down her life for the child. When we proclaim we love someone, are we ready to protect and nurture? are we ready to see them as our own loved ones?

Are we ready to lay down our life?

One day a long long time ago, a father choose to take a path that many other questions to protect and love his children, he spent many years in disguise trying to approach his children, no matter how naughty and how many times they doubted him. One day, he laid down his life for his children, many other questions this decision also, but the father wouldn't have it any other way, because he loves his children, even if they were naughty.

That, is my Father. He has loved me for more than 3 years, it has been 21 years in fact.
And I can't wait for many more years together with Him.

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